The Torpe Road Chronicles: The Search For New Zealand...

WHERE THE F*CK ARE YOU???

I am staring at my dated laptop and I suddenly thought about her again. I've already checked all the necessary news feed on my Facebook profile, ( illegally ) downloaded songs that I need to listen to my mp3 player and checked and updated my anti-virus software. Dumaan nanaman sya sa isipan ko, so I tried searching for her on Facebook using her real name.

Nothing.

Instagram?

Nothing.

I tried the Google search engine.

Zilch.

It has been almost 10 years now, and I still don't know how "New Zealand" is doing.

                       

Who is she? Siya ang una kong niligawan. My first attempt at puppy love, my awkward advances, ang simula ng aking pagiging Torpe, at iba pa. I dubbed her "New Zealand" dahil dun na sya nakatira sa huli kong balita sa kanya, and taking a cue from a writer on a local Men's Fitness Magazine. And, well, to protect her identity. I really don't want a lawsuit dahil lang sa aking nais na ipahayag ang aking mga nilalaman. Naks.

( you can check out my post about my time with New Zealand HERE to know more. )

                        

It's very strange y'know? She would be the last person on earth that I know that wouldn't have a Facebook profile. She's very social at ma-boka sa lahat. Yung tipong nagse-selfie sa kama with matching GOOD MORNING ALL!!! GOD BLESS POH na comment. I would think that she uses a jejemon-like name for her Facebook profile, something like -= =- but that would be too absurd. Last that I have seen of her was her Friendster profile. But we all know what happened to Friendster now, didn't we?. All that I could ever dig up on her on the internet is a Myspace profile that has 3-4 pictures of her and a Picasa profile that I've just discovered recently. But those 2 discoveries don't really give out any new details on her. Mas madali pa nga akong makakuha ng impormasyon sa nurse na nag-alaga sa akin nung sinilang ako kaysa dito. Parang nawala lang sya sa daigdig. I remember having some "intimate conversations" with my brain about that and I arrived that merong mga tao na ayaw magpahanap. Kung bakit, yan ang isa sa mga misteryo sa mundong ito.

Having a habit of making stories in my head, I would often imagine my attempts to find her, like packing my bags and getting to New Zealand and knocking on doors, joining some neighborhood get-together, community outreach or a Christmas party just so I could get some leads. I recall an FHM article that I read where the country of New Zealand is a haven for paid prostitutes, where they get health benefits and government registration. That also played in my mind in New Zealand's scenario, pero mas minabuti ko na lang na wag nang ikwento ito masyado. For obvious reasons...

There is another scenario that I played in my mind ( yeah, I have knack for those ) where I finally meet New Zealand by getting an item online and doing "paying-cash-on-meetups" basis. We talked for hours on end, and exchanged numbers and we keep in touch for a while until she would disappear again. Or she would meet me sa isang party na pinuntahan ko. Ang mangyayari ay makikita ako ng isang kaklase ko nung elementary na nagkaroon ako ng alitan at marami na rin na nainom, kaya biglang lumapit sa akin at pinapahiya ako, sumsigaw sya at may mga sinasabi na mga salita na nakakasakit ng damdamin. Inaawat sya at lumabas naman ako para di na mapahiya masyado. Tapos may lumapit sa akin sa labas at si New Zealand yun. Kinamusta ako sa nangyari sa akin at nagkwentuhan na kami. Mga ganung eksena. Yeah, I have a lot of time on my hands. Or that I really tend to drift a lot when I'm all by myself. It can go something like this:

There I was, seating next to my first love New Zealand. She really blossomed into a woman. She kept talking about her last movie that she watched or something. I could care less about what she's talking about.

I'm just happy that she's here, physically. Then she stopped talking. I thought I did something to upset her. But she smiled and said, " Alam mo, na-miss kita, ( my name ) and suddenly held my hand. She looked at my eyes for what seems like an eternity. 
It seems she's giving me the "signals" na isang tanga lang ang di maka-gets nun.

At that moment, I felt something rushing inside me, and wanted to invite her to my place for a little...

Privacy. 

 ( * cue Porn sound of the 70's )

                     

Some of you might be asking, "Why the obsession with New Zealand?". You know, sometimes I wonder about that myself. I often think, "Ano ba, pu****ina, di ka ba maka-move on???". Granted, sometimes I border between a stalker and someone needing serious medication, pero first love ko sya eh, alam mo yun? You can never really forget your memories with your first love. You remember every single memory, good or bad. It is with her that I learned how to approach a girl, what not to say etc. Atsaka wala talaga akong balita sa kanya, di ko alam kung may pamilya na sya, mayaman na entrepreneur, deds na ( just saying ) o may isang hacienda na sa New Zealand na country at nakaupo na lang sa isang villa, nagpapamaypay na lang na may hawak na red iced tea at nagbibilang ng salapi ( there goes my brain again... ) making me more intrigued about her whereabouts. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" mentality. We're just wired that way.

So there. Just something that I wanted to share. It's always fun to revisit my "The Torpe Road" subjects. Wag mahiya sa saloloobin, find ways to express yourself. Sana naaliw naman kayo kahit paano. And to New Zealand, wherever you are...

I hope you are doing fine. Sana buhay ka pa ( hey I'm just saying ) Hit me a line one of these days.

                        

One of these days...

- "the king"