Thursday, April 28, 2011

The Torpe Road Part 4

Welcome back to the “Road”!!! Granted, it took a while for me to write again, but we do have our conflicts. And besides, admit it or not, sometimes it’s a lot better to slack around than do something strenuous. We always hold off on things that we can do immediately. That’s the power of procrastination. It almost has the same influence as a grade school or High school kid discovering that he/she has no classes due to the weather. I miss the feeling

when just when I was about to get up from my bed to prepare to go to school my mother would tell me that classes got suspended from what she has heard on the radio. I would usually just turn around the side of my bed and sleep for an additional 1-2 hours. Life was pretty easy back then.

Now that I am working, those things are already a memory. You could still choose not to go to work if you know how to make an excuse or even make some fever-like mannerisms, but you could get sanctioned. That’s why there is Sabado Nights. At least you could still slack around a bit. Maybe hook up with a chick if you can. Ahhh, chicks. In high school we were given few options since our school was an exclusive all-boys before and when it became co-ed there were few women to ogle at. In college they were everywhere. It was like a carinderia. Madaming magpipilian. And so during that time I had a hand with a woman, who was all over me, but I refused. She will be named Las Pinas.

It was college. Luckily, I just spent the standard years there without taking summer classes or becoming an irregular student, or irreg for short. An irregular student is, by definition, a student that is taking few classes one seminar at a time. There are people like those because some are already working or kulang sa pera. It’s hard being an irreg because you feel left out with the younger classmates. Either way, on college there was a lot of freedom given.

I was playing my PS2, Counter-Strike, Battle Realms and DotA. I never really like DotA and Battle Realms since they take a while for the battles to heat up, but I had no choice since my barkada plays them. Wala akong choice kungdi laruin din yun at pag-tyagaan yung pag-le-level up. We were able to do those a lot since classes were pretty hassle-free. I took Fine Arts major in Painting at the time because I wanted to learn something new and explore my “artistic license”, so to speak. I mean, an ordinary school day is 5 hours of painting or drawing a human figure then 3-4 hours of either English, Mathematics or Theology class. Super-petix mode kami nun. Nahirapan lang kami nung last year na namin because we had to make and defend our Thesis. It was a solo work compared to a group effort so puyatan talaga. I would remember making a 12-ft. tall painting along with a 150-200 page book detailing the painting and my research. Man, it was tough.

Anyway, going back to my “endeavors”, in our University there were a lot of chicks nga, especially in Commerce course. There was even a place near the chapel and open field where we would sit on the stone benches and ogle at the fine women. I dubbed it the “Chick Road” and it clicked with my barkada. We would usually text “Uy, meet tayo sa Chick Road mamaya.” That was my biggest contribution to my group. Unfortunately, most of my barkada were also torpe. Puro sa tingin lang kami. Although I tried to court nursing student Qatar ( check Part 3 for more details ) I never summoned enough courage to approach or talk to someone outside our class. I should note that only a few of us were pretty shy withwomen. Some of mybarkada were matinik sa babae. But my closest friends? Wala, we were not Jersey Shore material.

But given the experiences that I had with the women in my High school and a way to start a new leaf because of a new set of people, friends and women, I’ve decided then to be more confident and befriend the opposite sex. I figure doing that will go a long way. Maybe someone will fall for me, or refer me to her friend. I was really ambitious, but it worked. I managed to talk to our female classmates and get close to some of them.

It was also during that time that I really became close to a female body. No, not a strip club, but I did went to one (but that’s another story) I became close in a way that I saw breasts, butts and curves thanks to FHM Magazine Philippines edition. Granted, I already saw nakedness in print form when I stumbled into my dad’s old Playboy Magazines but I was young. I wasn’t aware much of the female body and its workaround. I mean, I thought that kissing someone

in the lips is already sex. I fondly remember buying my first FHM: it was the June 2002 with the Sexbomb Girls on the cover. I bought that because there is the accompanying leaflet of the 100 sexiest women in the world. So besides the titillating pictures on the main magazine, there are also lots of pictures of different women on the leaflet. I remember skimming through the content and I masturbated to images of the still-new Jen Rosendahl. I mean, she had huge knockers. I originally plan on buying just the January (for the free calendar) and June (for the 100 sexiest supplement) of FHM, but I got hooked. I would always look for the new issue and buy it if the cover girl is attractive. Man, everybody fondly remembers the first time they bought an FHM.

Hot chicks aside, one of the classmates I got close to was Las Pinas. She was a few inches shorter than me, short hair, a little plump and has dark skin. She’s a little strange sometimes (more on that later) but nonetheless she was very nice to me and my barkada. She can be vocal at times. There was one time where we were waiting for our Professor to arrive at the studio that we did a little “debate”: to see who is better, the man or the woman. Of course, me and a couple of friends represented the man, she and a couple of friends represented the woman. I pointed out that women can be indecisive and moody. On the other hand they pointed out that men are so quiet and would prefer to be with his friends than his girlfriend. The “debate” almost got ugly but it was fun. I learned a lot on how women think. Most especially on how Las Pinas thinks. I mean, she’s really smart and can paint well.

There were times that I would separate myself from my group while we were sketching a live model and get to her set of friends and talk to her. That, and also borrow an eraser or a pencil from her. We talk a lot about stuff, like men being jerks, our family and TV shows. We would then laugh about everything and I felt content that I was talking to girls and I have removed my shyness. Las Pinas helped me with that. One of my professors noticed us and teased us as well as our class. It can be awkward at times pero nararamdaman ko na may feelings sya sa akin. I mean, we clicked together. I even called her my soul mate. I remember in a comic strip that this guy’s definition of a soul mate is someone who can finish the other’s sentences and knows what the other is thinking. Even though there are other ways to define a soul mate, I pondered on that comic strip and accepted that artist’s definition. She liked, for me, the fact I called her my soul mate. But, she’s not my type.

I know that beggars cannot be choosers, but I just accepted her as a friend. She can be weird at times. When I would text her sometimes she would reply “Hehehehehehe…” and parang lahat ng ginagawa mo may ibig sabihin sa kanya. I fear that if I would court her and we would go steady she would always bother me with nonsensical texts and kung anu-ano iisipan nya. At di sya sexy. I know it’s really unfair, pero I had a philosophy na “lagi ko na ngang nakikita sa bahay nanay at ate ko na mataba, pati ba naman girlfriend ko mataba??? ” which I still follow up to this day. It’s like if your vital stats are not those of a beauty queen, or at least close to it, wala, “Hi friend” na lang tawag ko sa yo. Yeah, I’m a beggar that chooses. Pake mo?

But even if I have no interest on her whatsoever, she helped me, and in turn I helped her too. There was this time that she had a feud with one of her best friends and she gave Las Pinas a crumpled letter. The letter read that she doesn’t want to be her friend anymore. Girls can be cruel. I comforted her and she was able to vent out her frustrations on me. There was also one time that I wanted to talk to her on the phone so I called her up and a family member

answered it and he called Las Pinas. I was shocked that she talked to me and it’s like she was panicking. Heck, it seems like she was hyperventilating. Parang madami syang gustong sabihin sa akin. I calmed her down and she was able to speak at a normal pace. Then at our annual University Christmas celebration she gave me a letter. Some parts of it read:

Ei… soulm8! Hello poh! Ok na poh me… di naman halata na di ako ok kc taba pa rinakoh… hehe. Thanks for being there…thank you poh talaga…Flash back lahat ng nangyari pus bigla mong nahulaan problema koh…kaya pala soulm8 kita lam mo lahat! Hehehe… Nga pala pasensia ka na kung medjo tinatago ko pa sayo pati pag-iyak ko kahit obvious… nahihiya lang me… tulad ngayon… nahihiya ako sayo…pasencia na ha…medyo magulo at ang daming iniisip ng utak koh. Minsan nga parang bigla na lang sasabog…hay…nahihiya lang ako kc baka isipin mo mahina ako, tanga…etc…pasencia na talaga. Gusto ko pang makipagkwentuhan sayo pero ikaw naman magkwento. Thanks for the time ha. Sana lagi kang andyan para kung gusto kong umiyak ulet…may magsesermon sakin. Hehehe…Enjoy ko pohmakipagkwentuhan sayo…Salamat poh talaga ng marami…ingatz lage…ditto lang poh me if you need me… God Bless

It was nice to be cherished by an opposite sex. I mean, I rarely get that, save my mother, of course. The same cannot be said for this one girl that I wanted to court (which I will give a name on the next “Road”) where I learned from Las Pinas that she has no interest on me. I mean, she just looked at me as a “friend” lang. I heard this from her over the phone that night. I was on our living room and everybody on our house retired on their beds. I was so aggravated at the world that I made a leap of faith:

Me: Las Pinas, bakit di na lang maging tayo?

Las Pinas: Ha?? Anong pinagsasabi mo?

Me: Wala, bakit di natin subukan?

Las Pinas: Ano ba yang pinagsasabi mo, (my name), gulo lang utak mo, itulog mo na lang yan.

You know, I thought during that time that she would say yes. Magulo lang talaga utak ko nun, di ko lang lubos na matanggap na magiging single ako forever. I guess she thought it would be a bad idea ( which it really is) to put together a relationship based on a spur-of-the-moment. After a few days I shrugged off of what happened that night and became distracted with DotA and making paintings (or what we would call “plates”).

But count it to old faith as it was the Holy Week that time and me and my family went out to a one-of-a-kind Visita Iglesia where we went to different Churches on the outskirts of the Philippines. We were going home then when she texted me. At first it was just small talk until she replied:

Las Pinas: ( my name ), naalaala mo pa ba yung tinanong mo sa akin dati?

Me: Oo, bakit?

Las Pinas: Oh, try nga natin.

Me: Ha???

I chuckled out loud at what she texted me. It seems that she’s aggravated at the world. Throughout that time I had no interest in accepting her offer because I just wanted to finish my Thesis next semester and I’m preparing my body for all the workload I’ll go through. So women can wait. I’m looking ahead for work life since I would have some more free time and more money to buy things I wanted (which got me into a full-fledged spree collecting toys). Anyway, I declined her offer and we graduated not as a couple, but as a fellow classmate.

Years have gone by and we went on our separate ways. I worked at a call center (I would like to note that I still got in touch with my passion for the Arts by joining an Independent Comic group, which is my first Love, and blogging ) and she pursued her passion for the arts by becoming an Art teacher at her High School. She had a handful with the students because she is teaching First Year to Fourth Year sections. Siguro kulang sa pera yung Alumni nya to get more teachers. I remember that I saw her again at a small reunion in a famous mall and she had eye bags as black as a mole. But all

her hard work paid off as she passed her board exam and got her license to teach recently. Good for her, at least she gets a little bit more on her paycheck. From what I’ve seen on her FaceBook profile she is in a relationship with her childhood friend and occasionally meeting with her college barkada. Up to now we were still teased and I still feel up to now she has feelings for me. Kapal ng mukha ko, oo, pero we men have that intuition.

So what have I learned here? It seems that there are people who chose to be single by choice. Even if there are some that fall for them, that person will still sift through the choices given to him/her and wait or pick someone they would much prefer. That person feels that life will give him/her something better if you just wait a little bit more. And if you just wait, you’ll get your just rewards. So wag mo na pakialaman mga ganun, di mo naman problema/buhay yun eh.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

The Torpe Road (Pit Stop)

It's been a while since I've posted something here, but I am a writer, and I do have my moods (palusot!!)

Well, actually, I have internet problem (in short, walang load) and I do have a hard time writing what with my call-center lifestyle of "kain-tulog-idlip-nuod-ng-konting-TV-pikit-ng-konti-ang-mga-mata-pahinga" ek-ek... So my rest days are wasted on FB and writing more of my past. And oh, manual labor.

So here is a "pit stop" to sate your appetite while waiting for the next "Road" (soon, I promise) heck, I might even do more of this since I could post my playlists when I was young, post some excerpts from my "journal" that I'm writing on for 4 years or anything in between...

Anyway, here some music I am listening to get myself in the mood for being the "Lonely Torpe Traveler"

here is also something that I really love to listen back in highschool.. .it was a treat to download this on my laptop recently.

here is also something that I associated this song when New
Zealand broke my heart... I remember that I cried to this once...

And the ultimate anthem for the Torpe:

As a parting shot, here are some images I've edited using PhotoShop (model is Jahziel Manabat, Premiere Condoms Model Contestant) Like her on FaceBook,